Is whatever I'm doing cool enough to be worth the mess afterward?

As a mom, I've become a master barterer when it comes to getting things done around the house or catching a few minutes to myself. There's no actual money involved, but pretty much no matter what I'm doing, if certain children aren't in my sight there will be a cost. So is it worth letting them out of my sight? Sometimes. Here's what I've been buying from my children lately.

For sale: Fifteen minutes of quiet dinner prep.

Price: Violet coloring all over--and I mean ALL OVER--her body with a pen, including all unmentionable areas. Her artwork was so thorough that she ended up having pen on her skin for days and days and days.

For sale: Thirty seconds of clearing the breakfast dishes from the counter and loading them into the dishwasher.

Price: One entire liter of water spilling on the hardwood floor in our dining room after Jacob climbed up on the table and knocked over Dave's drink. Awesome that it was water, but it was alllll over the room.

For sale: Two minutes of cleaning up the kitchen and, yes, texting my sisters and checking for Facebook notifications.
Price: Violet helping herself to a yellow highlighter and carefully filling in the lines between each stripe on the sheets that were on my bed.

For sale: A five-minute shower all by myself without Jacob being in there with me.
Price: Water all over the bathroom floor from Jacob repeatedly opening the shower curtain, plus the girls stripping him completely naked and stuffing him into an infant sleep sack and then into a small doll crib.

For sale: Five minutes of eating lunch while reading a book.
Price: Violet coloring all over the living room wall with a pencil.

For sale: Putting a salad on the table before we were actually sitting down to eat in the hopes that we would eat sooner if the table was set.
Price: Jacob--you guessed it--climbing up on the table and tossing the entire salad (plus half a loaf of bread) on the floor one piece at a time.

And the most expensive purchase I've made lately . . .

For sale: Thirty minutes of dinner prep with only minor interruptions from Madeline, who needed more supplies for the valentines she was making for the kids in her class, and from Jacob, who needed additional food as he ate an early dinner in his high chair.

Price: Violet giving all three kids a hair cut. She had been looking sneaky with the scissors so I took them away to prevent a problem. When I changed Jacob's diaper a few minutes later, he left a chunk of his hair on the floor and I knew immediately what had happened. Later I said the dinner prayer and Violet interrupted, "Mommy, don't forget to pray that I will choose the right and not do bad things like cut hair when I'm not supposed to." So I said another prayer and mentioned Jacob's haircut. Whereupon she interrupted me again and said, "You forgot to say that I should not cut Jacob's hair OR my hair OR Madeline's hair!" Whereupon I inspected their hair and found large chunks missing, and then found a few handfuls of hair on the living room floor. In Madeline's defense, she heard the snip behind her head but was so engrossed in her valentines that she didn't realize what Violet had done. In Jacob's defense, he's a baby and is used to Violet doing things that he doesn't like. In Violet's defense . . . I've got nothing.

Sensing a theme here? Good thing these guys are cute, since I should apparently never cook, clean, eat, shower, or breathe unless they're with me.